Feedback as Fuel

Feedback as Fuel

Personally and in the classroom, I’m focusing on how we receive and process feedback. Like many of you reading this, my group is fresh off a set of weekend performances and a mountain of feedback from people who haven’t spent the last two months working in the trenches with us.

Some of the feedback was positive, some was constructive, and some was confusing, but all of it can be useful. The question is: am I mature enough to use it?

High performers and artists are notorious for taking their craft extremely personally. It’s part of what makes them great, but if you’re not careful, it’s also part of what can make them blind to critical feedback.

I get so caught up in what I know and understand about my work that I’ll refuse to hear what others are saying, positive or constructive. I’ll blow right past a compliment if it doesn’t align with my narrative of how something is going, and worse, I’ll often ignore a critical piece of constructive feedback because, well…it hurts my feelings. (I know…I know…some of you are shocked to hear that I have feelings - part of my upgraded software package.)

Things I try to remember, and coach my students to remember, about feedback:

• Treasure those outside the circle whom you trust, and seek their honest feedback.

  • We’re often too close to the product to be objective, so allowing people you trust to be candid about your work is a critical piece of leveling up.

• Don’t assume maliciousness.

  • Even when it is misinformed or poorly delivered, most feedback comes from a desire to help.

    • We’ll have to talk about how this applies to those maddening parent emails another time…but I still stand by this statement in (virtually) every situation. 😂

• But just because someone said it or wrote it doesn’t make it true.

  • While possibly well-intentioned, they may have missed the mark. They likely didn’t mean to, so it’s OK to let it go.

• Resist the urge to take it personally. (This one is REALLY hard for me.)

  • I have to ask myself: am I upset because the feedback is invalid, or am I upset because they might be right?

• Remember that feedback isn’t always objective.

  • Is this feedback a statement of fact, or a subjective opinion shaped by someone’s background and experiences?

When approached correctly, feedback is a critical part of growth and increased performance. It can be the fuel that propels us toward the best versions of ourselves.

Am I willing to pay the price to fuel up?
Am I mature enough to recognize the fuel I need?

Have a great week!

Jeff